


wrong turns (may lead us back home)

by JaMills



Category: SPY x FAMILY (Manga)
Genre: Aged-up Anya Forger, Bad ending Au, Father-Daughter Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Grumpy Teenager Anya, Slightly OOC Anya, Stressed Dad Twilight, This is why I can't have a writing app
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:54:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26850232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaMills/pseuds/JaMills
Summary: Twilight turned his head to footsteps behind him and held a breath. He would never grow used to meet her taller, older and colder everytime they met."Twilight." Anya spoke softly, far more composed than her former childish self. "Long time no see."It hurt him she didn't call him "Papa" anymore.- - -In which Operation Strix comes to an end and so does the Forger family.
Relationships: Anya Forger & Loid Forger | Twilight, Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess
Comments: 30
Kudos: 121





	wrong turns (may lead us back home)

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted a bad ending AU where no one dies lol. BRING IN THE ANGST FOR THE SXF, WE NEED MORE!
> 
> Hope you like it~~

"Miss Heiden, you have a visitor." The girl's dorm housekeeper chirped in after knocking on the door.

The 15-years-old teenager stopped her moving hand over the notebook. She still had a lot of homework to do, but this special event shouldn't be postponed. Even if she didn't want to meet anyone, she needed to go down and talk to them. She had a mission. She needed to give her report.

"Tell them I won't take long." She answered putting her pencil back in the case and closing her books. She wasn't in a rush of any kind. She could calculate how much was too long or too soon. And even if she was way more mature nowadays, she was still petty enough to make them wait as much as possible.

There was only one person to come a day late for her birthday: Agent Twilight.

She missed the days when he was her "Papa".

The pink haired girl grabbed a folder behind her desk. She kept drawings there as a cover, but also intel she put her hands onto while talking with her classmates. Being an esper in a elite boarding school has its advantages. She could be useful to maintain the peace between East and West.

When Anya came to "Saint Amelia's School For Girls" eight years ago, her name was changed to Marianne Heiden.

She remembered it as clear as day. Sylvia had to actually pull her away from the car's backseat with help from the school employees. The desperate yells and the tear stained face of a child screaming "I wanna go home! Please, I want to stay with Papa!" simply passed as a spoiled rich kid's tantrum for the nannies. Sylvia couldn't look at her in the eye after that.

Anya knew why she was there. She understood her father's plan, how he only did that to keep her safe, to keep her where they could meet again one day. 

It didn't mean she would ever accept it.

The hallways leading to the visiting area were long and far too familiar for her liking. She spent more time at Saint Amelia than all her peers. On holidays and summer breaks, when a great majority of the girls would go home, she would stay. It wasn't rare for Sylvia to send in a car to pick her up and drop her off to a summer/winter camp so she could at least pretend to have a family. Sometimes, the lady herself would take her out to a weekend of ice cream and spy training. Anya felt pathetic, at times.

On script, the Heidens were a rich family living on the Ostanian border that worked in the construction business. Her parents were strict and sent her to Saint Amelia to give her the best education in the continent. Sometimes she would forget the name of her fake incognito father. She only remembered her mother's because it was a character in Bondman's cartoon. Those childish memories were quite bitter in her mouth.

The visiting area could be described as a garden with several tables and chair for people to chat. Only a very selected group could enter the school to visit a student with the parents' consent. Normally, Sylvia would be an aunt. Twilight was a butler. They never bothered to send people to act as her fake Heiden parents.

She hasn't seen Yor since she left Berlint all those years ago. They kept in contact with letters, but that wasn't near enough. She missed her Mama.

Across the garden entrance she found a tall, elegant, lonely figure staring at the flowers. He usually didn't use any elaborate disguises when visiting her. 

With that hat and the worn-out suit, he ressembled her long dead father Loid Forger.

\- * - 

He was late. A whole day completely late for her birthday. Twilight had been planning that trip for weeks now and he still managed to mess it up. For someone who always aimed for perfection, that was a low blow to his ego. Nonetheless, he was already used to making those crap ass mistakes since Operation Strix all those years ago.

It wasn't a mistake that threatened his career. Actually, after Donovan Desmond was out of the picture, WISE made sure to compensate Twilight generously for his work and his colleagues appraised him even more. But messed up greatly with his family, the Forgers. 

He had stopped calling them a fake family long ago.

\- * -

_Loid confessed everything two days before the grand finale of Operation Strix. How he was supposed to kill Donovan Desmond, how the peace between the nations should be kept, how there wouldn't be no more Loid Forger as soon as his mission was completed._

_Twilight was making one mistake after another at that. The biggest one was to get attached. He should disappear without a second thought after Desmond was taken care of. Instead, he planned for Yor and Anya to disappear with him. He knew what would follow in Ostania after his mission and it wouldn't be pretty. He could arrange for Yor and Anya to flee as political refugees to a neutral country and maybe, just maybe, they could meet again in a more peaceful life. One in which Twilight wasn't Loid Forger or Twain Foney or any other fake persona. One in which he was just_ him _. He didn't know what that could mean anymore. It was one of the most selfish things he ever did._

_He expected to be met with shock and anger from Yor. Damn, he would have prayed to be just that and maybe a slap on his face. He deserved it. Instead, when he told her the truth, she jumped six feet over their countertop and threatened him with a needle bigger than his arm. She looked murderous, unforgiving and, worst of all, betrayed._

_Hadn't Anya broken into the kitchen and make them stop, it would have ended in a bloodbath. Twilight doubted his habilities to get out of that alive. He also doubted he could bring himself to hurt Yor._

_The explanations were messy and it definitely didn't end their day with hugs and good night kisses. Things wouldn't be okay. Not that day, not that day after. There were just too many things on their way to keep being a happy family._

_To start it all, Yor worked as an assassin for Ostania. She couldn't just leave for another country, they would track her down and demand answers. It wasn't like she was super excited to follow Twilight's demands after finding out the truth, anyway._

_In the middle of that chaotic adult's talk, Anya decided it was time to tell the truth about her as well. She was desperate, she didn't want her family to be broken apart, she didn't want to be alone ever again._

_So she told her Papa and her Mama about her powers. She didn't mention Bond because she didn't find it necessary. They were shocked, to say the least. All this time, the most innocent member of that family knew too well what they did in the shadows, the gruesome side they kept hidden to themselves so to not startle their loved ones. Twilight, especially, felt like an idiot. He always deemed himself so smart and attentive to people around him, but he could never guess a child -_ his _child - could read his mind._

_He knew about the people in Ostania who would be hunting down Anya. Amidst that political chaos, it wouldn't take long for them to track her whereabouts with external help. No matter how careful they were, it was dangerous. Anya was in danger._

_That stressful night, they put Anya to sleep with lots of reluctance and went to converse quietly in the kitchen, Yor with her trusted needles and Twilight with his gun. The Thorn Princess could still be very eager to hit his head with a frying pan, but they needed to discuss what would happen to Anya. She knew he truly cared for her._

_They decided to follow Twilight's initial plan, of sorts. Yor wouldn't leave Ostania, but she would take care of Anya. She was capable enough of raising her and protecting her from wicked scientists' harm. As for Loid Forger, he would disappear one day to never come back. Maybe one day, another man that coincidentally looked a lot like him would pay a visit to the widow and the child so they could talk amicably again. Yor doubted her grudge would go away that fast._

_For a whole day, they stuck with that plan and tried to lead a normal life until the end of Operation Strix. Anya called in sick and didn't go to school. She didn't have it in her to meet Damian knowing his father would die._

_At dinner time, Yor was late. It was rare for her to come home after her husband, but that was the case that day. Twilight felt anxious as he stared at the clock in the wall waiting for her to come back._

_The phone rang and he just knew there was something wrong going on._

_Twilight answered it with sweating hands and a slightly trembling voice._

_"Hello, this is the Forger residence."_

_It would be the last time that surname would leave his mouth._

_"Loid," it was Yor on the other line, her voice sounding strained but determined nonetheless. "I have 48 hours to deliver a work with a man that goes by the name 'Twilight'."_

_Twilight felt a cold shrill down his spine._

_"Yor..."_

_"I never disappoint my employer, Loid. I can't disappoint him." She sounded pained while saying that, as if she also didn't want to do it. "So, no matter where and when I find this Twilight guy, I_ will _do my job. That's why he better be completely alone when I meet him. Because if I have to talk business with him while a child is watching, it won't be a bother_ at all _."_

_Twilight swallowed a lump at those words. He understood it all too well. Yor would kill him. There was no turning back for that. So he needed to get Anya to a safe place as soon as possible. Otherwise, she would have to watch it. This was a fight between adults and she definitely didn't need to get a glimpse of it._

_"Yor," Twilight hated himself at how soft his voice came out. "when are you coming home?"_

_Yor seemed to choke back a cry. Twilight clenched his fists at the hopeless sound. It was his fault. It was all his damn fault._

_"I don't know, work has been keeping me so busy." He couldn't see, but Yor was actually trying to smile now. "I'm sorry I can't join you for dinner tonight. I'm really sorry, Loid."_

_"You don't need to apologize, Yor." Twilight said with closed eyes, not daring to say any other thing that would delate his true emotions._

_"Tell Anya that I... Please, tell Anya that I love her. And that as soon as I get home, I'll give her my best hug."_

_He couldn't say anything to that. Not when his mind was blank and Yor ended the call abruptly, leaving him with a beeping receiver in hand._

_Twilight picked a nearby plant vase and threw it on the floor with all his force, startling the poor dog by the door. It was stupid and idiotical, but he needed to let out his frustration somehow._

_After cleaning up his mess and calming himself, he picked his suitcase, a sleeping Anya in his arms, Bond on a leash and left the apartment._

\- * -

He didn't know how much time he spent looking at random flowers in the school's garden. They always looked the same no matter how many times he came. Well, it's not like he came a lot, to be honest. The last time he managed a visit was almost two years ago.

Twilight turned his head to footsteps behind him and held a breath. He would never grow used to meet her taller, older and colder everytime they met.

"Twilight." Anya spoke softly, far more composed than her former childish self. "Long time no see."

It hurt him she didn't call him "Papa" anymore.

Anya was roughly a head and a half shorter than him nowadays. She wore the mandatory uniform of Saint Amelia which consisted of a knee length plaid skirt and a dark maroon sweater. Her hair was held in two high buns and she had side bangs. She reminded him a bit of Yor.

He didn't change too much in those eight years, but some would argue his hair was thinning and there were hints of wrinkles around his eyes. It didn't stop him from being the best spy in the world.

It did remind him of how much time passed since Berlint.

The two stood awkwardly in front of each other, not really knowing how to make a proper greeting even after all these years of lukewarm meetings. Anya made a move to shake hands, but her mind reading powers caught on that:

" _Damn it, not this_."

She stopped midway and Twilight blinked in blushed realization at what just happened. He momentarily forgot she could see his thoughts and, in other words, find out he was actually disappointed with just a handshake.

Anya rolled eyes and decided she was going to be just a little benevolent today, so she stepped in for a hug without a second thought. Twilight stood stiff for a second before hugging her back, shoulders gradually relaxing at his small victory of the day. 

"Anya." When she stepped back, he said in a disappointed tone. "I'm sorry that I missed your birthday. The train was delayed and then..."

"It's fine." She wouldn't make a big deal of it anyway. He could come up with better lies if he wanted to. 

The two sat down on a table far enough of the door so no one could peep on their talk. It didn't keep them from talking in a lower voice than normal. Anya still had a long way to go with codes, but she wasn't in the mood to practice that day.

"Would you like some tea? Coffee?" She asked politely, putting good use for the etiquette classes she barely passed that year. "I can ask a maid to bring some."

It was actually uncomfortable to see Anya acting so grown-up and formal with him, but Twilight decided not to dwell much on that.

"Don't bother with me." He said as he pulled something from inside his coat. "I brought you a gift."

"Oh." Anya raised her eyebrows in mid surprise as she held the box. It was actually quite big. "I'm too old for this kind of stuff."

"You're not." Twilight assured with a faint smile. He remembered how excited Anya would act when getting presents. 

"Thank you." The girl said as she made her best to open the package and not read Twilight's thoughts to find out in advance. She furrowed her brow at the unfamiliar object. "Is this...?"

"A mobile phone." Twilight answered somewhat proudly as she handled the device curiously. "There aren't many on the market, but I managed to put my hands on one."

Her mouth went agape as she stared at the - heavy - mobile phone in disbelief. That made Twilight all the more proud in himself. It was nice to see that under all that formality, Anya was the same when surprised.

"This must be so expensive!" She said in exasperation, putting the phone down. "The girls will _hate_ me if they find out I have one before them. Who am I even supposed to call with this?"

"You can call me." He faked a cough with that. "This gives more privacy. So you don't need to talk in code on the school's phone."

Any sign of excitement dissipated with that and Anya finally remembered to act like a moody and despicable teenager.

"You're too busy for that, Twilight..."

"Don't." He interrupted gravely, just to sigh softly later. "Please, don't call me that, Anya."

"You aren't supposed to call me by this name, either." She retorted avoiding his gaze with stubborn pout. "Did you forget? My name is Marianne. Marianne Heiden. _You_ chose it."

He thought about arguing with her, but dealing with teenagers was hard enough and this was an _esper_ teenager, to top it all. His adopted esper teenager daughter.

"...That's true." It was all he managed to say, in the end.

He wasn't sure when exactly Anya grew from her bubbly and emotional self to, well, _this_. But surely it wasn't too long after she first came to Saint Amelia. Anya held a deep grudge for Twilight leaving her behind. No matter how much he explained, she wouldn't accept it. It wasn't just a teenager thing.

But he just couldn't let her roam freely as she pleased. His work was dangerous and so was Yor's. He wouldn't make another mistake concerning her safety. No one should find out about her powers.

Not even WISE.

Since that night in Berlint, Yor and Twilight were still the only ones to know about Anya's secret. When Twilight had to think fast on how to protect her before facing Yor, he reached to Sylvia. Not as a Handler, but as a friend. The woman owned her fair share of favors to him, anyway. She also had a daughter she protected by keeping a fair and cruel distance. She knew how to hide a child.

In the end, the Handler was the one to make the arrangements for Anya to leave for the South border and enroll in Saint Amelia. The woman had good connections abroad to secure a spot for a rich heiress with a shady background. They could do anything with the right amount of money and Twilight soon would have more than enough.

And that's how they've been going for the last years. Twilight never really talked about his last encounter with Yor and Anya pretended to not be interested. She was glad her mother was safe, at least. She was also sure Yor kicked Twilight's ass real good.

Before the silence became too suffocating between them, Anya decided to talk business as she pushed her drawing folder across the table.

"Here is my report for the last 23 months." She announced quite proud of her work. Her files were getting more organized each time. "The Horvatič sisters have been gushing about a new cassino their parents opened in South Kuprinia, you might want to look into that."

Twilight took the folder with hesitating hands. He usually procrastinated his checking on Anya's "reports" as much as he could, because it made it all too real she was engaged in the espionage world. They talked about it multiple times and it always ended with Anya throwing a tantrum saying he couldn't boss her around after abandoning her. He hated the idea of her becoming a spy. It was dangerous, tiring and, more than anything, painful to build plastic lives knowing it was all for a mission. She should know it well with her experience.

But maybe, after seeing his faults from so up close, she would be more careful than he was.

"Thank you." He said after some time, then finally mustering up courage to ask the next question. "Have you... heard about your mother?"

"Her last letter came in March." Anya didn't beat around the bush when it came to Yor and he was glad for that. "She moved North. Not many details about work."

"I see." He nodded absentmindedly. "I hope she's doing fine."

The smug grin the girl had now made him look quite out of place.

"You can bet she is." It didn't take mind reading powers to know the truth about that question. Twilight was still quite dumb when it came to feelings.

They continue to make small talk for undefined time and Twilight was quite content with that. This Anya changed a lot from the one he picked out of an orphanage all those years ago and he cursed himself for not being present enough to watch those changes unfolding. But he was grateful that, even with all resentment, he still had a place in her life. It wasn't the same one, but she still had a smile he would fight to protect.

Before Anya could engage in another annoyed rant about her fencing instructor, Twilight asked:

"Would it be alright if you spent the next summer break with me?" He was actually anxious about being rejected, but he should wait for an answer.

She stopped talking and stared at him with wide eyes. Maybe she just heard it wrong and accidentally peeped on another nearby person's thoughts.

"Summer break?" She whispered not really believing. "You're taking me home?"

"Well, not me, but Mr. Berthram Heiden, your father." He held back a laugh at her unimpressed face towards the joke. "He's planning a long vacation and is actually looking forward to spend time with his daughter. He may be a busy man, but he deeply cares for her."

There was something about giving non-existent people your actual feelings that just made it so much easier to convey things. Fortunately, Anya understood. And she was far too overwhelmed by the possibility of leaving that boring school to keep her rebellious and cold façade in check.

"Can we look for Mama?" She asked expectantly. Anya missed Yor so bad, she wanted more than some letters with attached pictures.

Twilight's smile subsided.

"I don't think she wants me to look for her..."

"Oh, of course she wants to! Who doesn't want a prince in shiny harbour to come look for them?"

"It's 'shiny armour', Anya."

"I knew that." She dismissed it with a waving hand and made her best impression of a spoiled daughter with doe eyes. "Please, Papa!~"

Well, she was playing dirty here. But Twilight used dirty tricks now and then, as well. She took after him.

"We can discuss this later." He sighed, already expecting a headache from gathering info about Yor Briar. "So, it's a deal. I'll pick you three weeks from now. Pack lightly, we can buy you new clothes in Saurset."

Anya surely had a good chunk of grudge and petty feelings with her and she could bring them out perfectly aligned like a deck of cards anytime she wanted to. But she also loved having a father, even if he was such a stupid liar.

But Papa was a _cool liar_.

"Thank you, Papa." Anya said as she stood up to hug him. "My dog better be alive or else I'll mourn for the whole season."

Twilight scoffed.

"Bond is brand as new, you don't need to worry." He said before tentatively ruffling her hair, which she didn't mind at all. "I missed you, Anya."

"Missed you, too, Papa."

**Author's Note:**

> \- I'm weak, so while Handler's child is probably dead, I headcanon she kept her daughter away to keep her safe  
> \- Bond is immortal, fight me.  
> \- Older Anya's design [ based on starcider's art](https://starcider.tumblr.com/post/631004064014008321/worldsbestdilfbecky-its-just-a-sketch-but-i-had)
> 
> That was it for today! Kudos, comments and questions about this AU are very welcome ❤❤❤


End file.
